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I originally wrote this article under the pseudonym "PDAllstar77" for content for the 2010 SPL website.  Cringe-tastic. I couldn't tell you why I did, only that I remember writing it by hand during my breaks at the pizza place I was working at the time.

*edit* Here's the link to the article on

I hate Sparkers.

Hello everyone. I want to convey first and foremost that I do not claim to be good at this game. I do, however, have a deep understanding and longtime knowledge of team building and what it takes to get things done. I am going to roughly describe what I believe to be building blocks of making a successful team in any setting: game, sport, workplace, education, and the arts can all benefit from greater team skills.

I know that many of you may disagree with me, as I disagree with many others on many things. Understand that I am not stating this as fact, rather I am giving insight into what I believe to work, take it for what you think it’s worth.

I will be writing this article in regards to Spark.

The three fundamental aspects of having a successful team are: Attitude, Effort, and Enthusiasm.

I believe that if the team as a collective buys into these three ideals and what they represent, that team can be successful in their chosen endeavor.


I define attitude as the conscious manifestation of a player’s inner motivation for playing the game. Attitude is very important in Spark. Players have many individual motivations for playing the game: fun, boredom, to be the best, friends, or a combination of those and more. So you’re motivated to play the game, but what is attitude? Attitude is basically your mindset while playing the game, your perspective on what is happening in the game, and how your mind reacts to different events.

Examples of attitudes are:

* I want to learn as much as possible to get good at this game
* I want to get good at this game but don’t need help
* I am already good at this game, and don’t need to improve
* Who the fuck are you to give me advice!? fuck off.
* We don’t stand a chance to win this match.
* If everyone does their job, we will win this match.
* It’s my team’s fault that I never win.

Note that attitudes can be good or bad.

I believe that the optimal attitude for a player to have is to realize that there is always room to improve, believe in yourself and your teammates, and to know that success comes with time, patience, and practice.

1. Room for Improvement

I have spent many a long night on ARC or Spark asking anyone good to help me get better. Do you know how many people have actually helped me? I can count them on one hand! This did not discourage me from trying. Watching videos of top clans on SparkTube has help me very much in my quest for ARC knowledge, use it!

I think a very important aspect of a player’s attitude is being coach-able. Being coach-able means being able to turn instructions intro results. Basically, being coach-able on Spark is listening to advice from top players on things that range from technical (spreading, dodging) to strategical (when to stall, rape, where to flag).

2. Make it Personal

Another important aspect of attitude is making the competition personal. It should literally disgust and offend you that the other team actually believes that they can come anywhere near your level. If some motherfucker rushes out into the open, do you think he respects our ability to kill him at whim? Of course he doesn’t. This should be enough to royally piss you off. I find it much better to be pissed off at my opponent rather than myself or teammates.

3. Take Responsibility

Do you want to be the guy who lets the team down? Of course you don’t, no one does. Everyone is accountable for doing their job. If you don’t do your job, you let the team down (don’t let your teammates down). A team in which everyone does their job every time is very difficult to defeat.


Effort can be defined as: doing an act beyond going through the motions; consciously “playing hard”. Without effort, attitude means squat. A player who continues to strive for improvement and perfection in their technical and strategical Spark skill-set must do so with effort! That is, NEVER lazily playing the game. If you’re not going to focus, don’t play. Chat in the lobby, post on the forums, spectate a game. But DON’T play, it can only breed bad habits.

1. Practice vs Games

Watch any NBA practice and the players are definitely NOT constantly playing a 5v5 full on full-court basketball game. NFL practices aren’t 11 on 11 football scrimmages.

An important thing that I think eludes many players when trying to become good in the current incarnation of the GO map is the aspect of technical drills and situational playing. Many players focus on ONLY playing GO, I think this is an error. Any map can be used to do drills, whether it be spreading, dodging, bouncies, raping/avoiding rape. Using GO is necessary for doing situational practices, such as both flags at mid and 3v2 with the 4th spawning or something like that…

This isn’t to say that playing 4v4 in GO all night can’t be beneficial, it certainly can be! Just be aware that time spent on specific aspect (technique/strategy) is time well spent.


Enthusiasm: portraying the feeling of extreme excitement in regards to something. Enthusiasm is a very important aspect of successful teams. You know the electric feeling of pure excitement and joy you get when you are owning? Enthusiasm is being outwardly vocal to your team in a positive way. This way teams can build themselves up and feel extremely superior to opponents.

I’m sorry! It is so late and I have rambled on and on.
I don't get why this is called "I hate sparkers" but it's good content Tongue